I'm not even sure what to say here....
I do know I'm a struggling drug addict(CAT is my poison), it could be 5 or 6 years I rate.
I know all the bad, I want to improve my life, by knowing this and being able to admit it , its already a big win for me..
I have no problem with getting clean, I can do it, I just think maybe my roots are deeper than the usual. Triggers are all around me..
Alot also has to do with the type of person I am, and why the hold on me is soo much stronger along with insecurities that I've been battling since a child which instantly disappears when I use..
Its difficult trying tooo stand against it day in and out when it seems so much easier too just go with it and have the mindset and energy levels that most people have in a day.
I do feel a little bit better just venting that off my chest, struggles are real and I do wish the best for everyone fighting in their own way!