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Went to a men's meeting this morning and the topic up for discussion was "Rigorous Honesty" and "Half Measures". Ever since i started attending AA I've always heard that half measures produce zero results. For the longest time i wasn't quite sure what it meant. I always used to believe that if i wasn't drinking i was sober regardless of how i viewed myself and others around me. As long as i don't drink, all the promises and the life i always wanted will just come to me. Well that wasn't the case. Throughout my life i was never really honest with anyone, myself included. I shared in the meeting that even as a child i used half measures. Never really followed through with certain tasks or commitments i agreed to. Was always a last minute excuse to get out of it or just blew the situation off entirely. I went through life like that for a long time. I was never truly honest with myself until i entered treatment. I realized that if i wanted to have a sober life then i had to go to any length to achieve my sobriety. But why was it so Hard? I would go to any length to get the bottle but why wouldn't I go to any length to stop? It's because i wasn't honest with myself. Thought a couple would be ok here and there, but you always pick up right where you left off, and that's what happened to me. My tolerance level was still the same and i would be off the races again. But being honest with myself and my sponsor, i now know that there is no such thing as Half Measures, for me it is FULL Measures. I need to be willing to give my all to have what the others in the room have, peace, serenity, and most of all Hope. Hope for the life you've always wanted. Anyone struggling with this topic feel free to reach out to me. Putting yourself out there for another suffering addict is what needs to be done. They say in the rooms the only way to stay sober is to give others suffering what you have, which is a strong faith, knowing that it can be done, with the help of a great support system but most importantly BE HONEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!
God Bless everyone. Keep up the fight and know if your heart that you can do it!!!!!